How Can I Stay Present When I Want My Gift Tomorrow?

Staying in the present moment has always been hard for me simply because I always want to know what’s next. I need to be prepared for the bad and the good, for the known and the unknown because life comes at you fast! But where do you find time to simply enjoy life when you’re always wondering what’s next?

During this pandemic I have been finishing my final semester working towards my Bachelor’s Degree and have no idea where I am going after I graduate. All semester I have been stressed for graduation, because oddly enough I realized, I haven’t thought this far. I have ideas, but I have no solid decision and I don’t think I ever will. Rather than continuing to freak out and put myself into emotional distress, I decided to work with what I got.

I may not know where I’m going, but I can write down my ideas and research where each idea can further lead my journey. I can refresh my resume and portfolio and just apply. I have this bad habit of selling myself short and convincing myself I am just not ready for certain positions yet, but that is not self-love, that is self-sabotage. Why would I already tell myself no, before anyone else? You have to root for yourself before anyone else!

I have also learned to stay connected with loved ones. I am terrible with answering the phone simply because I feel the need to mentally prepare myself for conversations with anyone. I recently had a conversation with my sister about being mindful of other’s feelings. I explained to her that when we our going through phases of isolation and wanting to be alone, our loved ones still deserve some type of contact just reassuring them that they are loved and appreciated. We cannot go “ghost” on people that we are close to and EXPECT them to still be around when we are out of our shell again. A simple heads up that you need time to yourself is all it takes to maintain a healthy and understanding relationship with those you hold close to. Do not observe this act as owing someone an explanation but a good practice of communication. Regardless of what is happening in the world, time is going to keep going. So how will you spend your time?

My way of staying in the present is continuing to express my love and gratitude to those I care for while I still can. I have also learned to act on my stress in a positive way. If I am worried about where I am going next, I simply create a project for myself that involves career searching. Nothing stresses me out more than wondering what to do, while doing nothing. I am still learning to not worry about tomorrow and being thankful for today, but acknowledging that thought is the first step!